The belief that a cosmic Jewish Zombie who was his own father can make you live forever if you symbolically eat his flesh and telepathically tell him you accept him as your master, so he can remove an evil force from your soul that is present in humanity because a rib-woman was convinced by a talking snake to eat from a magical tree.
A couple was invited to a swanky costume party.
Unfortunately, the wife came down with a terrible headache and told
her husband to go to the party alone.
He being a devoted husband protested, but she argued and said she was
going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his
good time being spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went.
The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened without
pain and, as it was still early enough, decided to go the party.
Since her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought she
would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when
she was not with him.
She joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around on
the dance floor, dancing with every nice woman he could, and copping a
little feel here and a little kiss there.
His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself,
he left his current partner high and dry and devoted his time to the
new babe that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished…
Naturally, (since he was her husband.)
Finally, he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed.
So off they went to one of the cars and had a “Quickie”.
Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away, went home, put
the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation
he would make for his behavior. She was determined to “Trap” him about
his infidelity.
She was sitting up reading when he came in, and she asked what kind of
a time he had. He said: “Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have
a good time when you’re not there.”
“Did you dance much ?”
“You know, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met
Pete, Bill Browning and some other guys, so we went into the den and
played poker all evening.
But you’re not going to believe what happened to the guy I loaned my
costume to….”

They both return to her office and the priest asks the old geezer,
“Sir, what seems to be the problem here?”
“There is no damn problem,” the man says. “I just won 20 million
dollars in the damn lottery and I want to join this damn church to get
rid of some of this damn money.”
“I see,” said the priest. “And is this bitch giving you a hard time?