Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category
The Human Flushing Toilet
2011
10.05
10.05
The Human Flushing Toilet
by Twitch Thomason.
Mankind from the beginning,
An entity’s piss upon the eternal sidewalk,
Ashes to ashes dust to dust,
’til the great divine custodian’s flush.
Embarassed by what happened,
Sent up a douche was to the ruler of the night,
And that was the first sign,
That chivalry had reached the end of it’s line.
It is more than apparent,
In your face who to blame,
infamous is the game called life,
Full of strife from childhood to grown up,
And still immaturity thrives.
Messing it all up.
Rise of the jerk from motion to being,
foreseen was the demise of man,
from the dirt gave us birth,
a few cleaned ourselves.
Yet many still stunk of the mud,
And caught the eye of the janitorial infinite.
It decided to plunge the seas,
Swirl up a little chaos for reality,
And take all the stank away from you and me.
But the human flushing toilet is a dream.
entrepreneurial ex: sell his shit!
2011
02.12
02.12
http://shop.ebay.com/myexboyfriendscloset/m.html
using her assets
More Beer
2011
01.16
01.16
More beer, more beer
All I want is more beer
More beer, more beer
All I want is more beer, more beer
When I get home from work and I’m dyin’ of thirst
All I want is more beer
I run into the kitchen and I tear off my shirt
All I want is more beer
Open up a six pack I’ll be downin’ it first
All I want is more beer
I can open up and finish faster than you
All I want is more beer
Gonna kill a case or maybe two
All I want is more beer
If there was no more beer then what would we do
All I want is more beer
More beer
More beer, more beer
All I want is more beer
More beer, more beer
All I want is more beer, more beer
All I want is more beer
All I want is more beer
All I want is more beer
[ From: http://www.metrolyrics.com/more-beer-lyrics-fear.html ]
All I want is more beer
All I want is more beer
All I want is more beer
And when I wake up in the morning
My mouth’s all parched and dry, parched and dry
And I crawl to the refrigerator
And I peek inside
And I feel like somebody drove nails
Into my head and eyes
And I’m hoping and I’m praying
I hope there’s one more beer
More beer, more beer
More beer, more beer
More beer, more beer
More beer, more beer
More beer, more beer
More beer, more beer
More beer, more beer
Florida Facts
2010
09.01
09.01
Finally, a true map of Florida that explains this weird, but wonderful state. Those of you who live in Florida will recognize it, and those who don’t have been warned !!!
You know you’re a Floridian if….
- You never use an umbrella because the rain will be over in five minutes.
- You think a six-foot alligator is actually pretty average
- Every other house in your neighborhood had blue roofs in 2004-2005
- “Down South” means Key West
- You know that anything under a Category 3 just isn’t worth waking up for.
- You know the four seasons really are: Hurricane season, love bug season, tourist season and summer.
- Your winter coat is made of denim.
- You can tell the difference between fire ant bites and mosquito bites.
- Anything under 70 degrees is chilly.
- You’ve driven through Yeehaw Junction.
- You know that no other grocery store can compare to Publix.
- You recognize Miami-Dade as ‘ Northern Cuba ‘
- You dread love bug season.
- You’ve worn shorts and used the A/C on Christmas and New Years.
- You are on a first name basis with the Hurricane list. They aren’t Hurricane Charley or Hurricane Frances. You know them as Andrew, Charley , Frances , Ivan, Jeanne & Wilma…Irene…Cheryl…Rita Mary… Alison
- You know what a snowbird is and when they’ll leave.
- Flip-flops are everyday wear. Shoes are for business meetings and church, but you HAVE worn flip flops to church before.
- You have a drawer full of bathing suits, and one sweatshirt.
- You get annoyed at the tourists who feed seagulls.
- A mountain is any hill 100 feet above sea level.
- You’ve hosted a hurricane party.
- You can pronounce Okeechobee, Kissimmee , Withlacoochee , Thonotosassa and Micanopy.
- You understand why it’s better to have a friend with a boat, than have a boat yourself.
- You were 25 when you first met someone who couldn’t swim.
- A good parking place has nothing to do with distance from the store, but everything to do with shade.
Dreams…
2010
07.18
07.18
I was not looking for my dreams to interpret my life, but rather for my life to interpret my dreams.
Susan Sontag
Wisdom from a junkie
2010
07.16
07.16
wisdom from a junkie
“Silence is only frightening to people who are compulsively verbalizing.”
William S. Burroughs